The Drought

Well, it has ended.  After a couple of weeks worth of whirlwind spontaneous sex with my husband we have come to a dry spell.  A drought.  It lasted through our anniversary night out and night in last Saturday for the first time having an adult night alone without our kids.  It was fantastic.  Then this week - NOTHING.  I can't help but feel down and abandoned and used.  I'm sure again he has no idea what the lack of attention this last week has done to me, but after a long spell of not feeling down it really sucks feeling once again unwanted and depression coming on. 

I know that I should be used to the let down but I really thought we were turning a corner.  I don't know what I am supposed to do.  Continue to react when he's in the mood to give me attention or to just stop all together. 

I feel lost, confused and alone, again.  I feel like an idiot for thinking things would change, for the better - but overall they are just the same as before, maybe a little different but still the same.

What do I have to do to have a consistent life with this man I love?  What is so wrong with me that I can't be wanted or get some attention on a regular basis.  I don't need the attention every day as we are both very busy at times, but a couple of days a week of reaching out really doesn't seem like too much to ask for.  I'm lost, I'm sad, I'm doubting my worth and purpose.

#alone #sad #depressed #lovedrought